Raging Blossoms, Ailing Leaves
狂花病葉

Date
2023/12

Filming Devices
GoPro HERO9 Black, Sony Cyber-shot DSC-RX10 IV

Props
Red Xuan paper leaves, red Xuan paper leaves string, red Xuan paper leaves mask, Eucalyptus tree leaves, Chinese calligraphy black ink, cheese cloth

Duration
7’16“

Category
Personal Project, Visual Narrative, Experimental Film, Performance

Raging Blossoms, Ailing Leaves is a visual narration depicting the intricate journey of a Chinese-origin female grappling with her fragmented memory and life experience, striving to forge a cohesive, hybridized identity within the context of a unique transnational existence.

This surrealistic media project comprises five dream-like scenes, each corresponding to the five directions and elements. Nature, the human body, ready-made objects, and cultural symbols present a nuanced exploration of the protagonist's profound cultural and psychological odyssey.

If you view things from the aspect of change,
Then heaven and earth can last no longer than the blink of an eye.
But if you view things from their unchanging aspect,
Then material things and I will never end.

To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour

— Su Shi, Ode to the Red Cliff

— William Blake, Auguries of Innocence

Inspiration & Research

1
Life Overseas

In 2019, I moved to San Diego for further education. Like many other foreigners, I encountered difficulties ranging from language and cultural barriers to learning and navigating new social norms.

Perhaps my Chinese nationality has added a unique flavor to my life abroad: I got to taste newfound freedom and the self-imposed restrictions under stereotypical labels like "spy" and "virus carrier."

Looking back at the end of 2023, what shocks me most is the realization of a significant fracture between my living environments, lifestyles, and identities. Despite eating, talking, driving, working, and socializing like every other San Diegan, from time to time, I found myself frozen among the crowd like a clueless child suddenly waking up from a long dream. The faces of my friends, the language exchanged among us, and the scent of spices feel familiar and distant.

This mental glitch would end within a few minutes, but I can feel something inside me is fragmented, even missing. Like the Ship of Theseus, I am facing the same dilemma: am I still the same person after my way of eating, talking, driving, working, and socializing has become unrecognizable under a brand new norm?

I resonate with both being Chinese and American, and I resonate with neither. Has this oversimplified categorization of nationality lost meaning in such an enmeshed and entangled world?

Walking on and generously fed by the land my ancestors have never heard of, I am on a journey to find a new voice that inspires the silenced individuals lost in the foreign landscapes of their minds—to bury the wandering phantoms in our memory so we can metamorphose and wake up once again. Without a doubt, pains and struggles will be our companions. But they are also reminders of the continuous cycle and creation between earth and flesh.

To better comprehend the ongoing discussion and exploration related to my life experience, I conducted research by searching for and analyzing the essays and books listed below (section 2 and 3).

2
Globalization/Transnationalism/Feminism/Psychology

Globalization: A Very Short Introduction (6th edn). Manfred B. Steger (2023) link

  • This latest version of the VSI book presents insights into the key aspects of globalization and newly raised issues in the 2020s.

  • "Globalization is about planetary interconnectivities, mobilities, and imaginations."

  • After decades of globalization, this notion of “interconnectivities” ranges beyond the superficial exchanges of numbers and information between individuals. The interconnection happens inside the individuals as cultures, beliefs, and values clash and merge.

Rethinking culture and identity in psychology: Towards a transnational cultural psychology. Bhatia, S. (2007) link

  • An essay analyzing how transnational diaspora communities have become new sites for the rethinking of core concepts such as culture, self, nation, and identity

  • The "multifaceted, fused, hybridized, fluctuating, and sometimes fragmented" identities — call for reinvention & reconstruction

  • The complexity of hybrid identities

  • The struggles about the norms or “core values

  • The back-and-forth movement between multiple homes and societies

  • The new generation: maintaining long-distance relationships with families & friends through social technology (e.g. phone calls, internet) is possible, which leads to enhanced social communication & the grief of loss and disconnection with the original culture.

It has become increasingly evident that traditional notions of gender, national, and cultural identities are no longer sufficient to comprehensively describe the living experience of new generations, given the profound influence of globalization and internet connectivity.

Advancements in technology have contributed to the fragmentation and hybridization of identity. The heightened emphasis on the micro, individualized life experience could be the new catalyst for reconstructing new social identities.

3
Chinese Culture/Literature/Worldview

Chinese Literature: A Very Short Introduction. Sabina Knight (2012) link

  • This VSI book provides a quick overview of Chinese literature throughout history, revealing the development of worldview, values, and concerns of Chinese culture.

  • The philosophical and literary discussion revolves around eternity and change.

  • “Whereas Indo-European languages often privilege nouns, essences, and substances, classical Chinese privileges verbs, processes, and situations.”

  • “The absence of a specific persona is common in classical Chinese poetry, especially landscape poetry... Instead of glorifying an individual subject, Chinese poems often efface the self. Softening the distinction between ‘subject’ and ‘object,’ such poems offer reflections on the world less mediated by individual personality.”

  • This deep-rooted culture of blurring self and the environment seems to be able to help me understand many positive and negative stereotypes about Chinese: being prone to the control of a feudal/totalitarian ruling, being hardworking and highly adaptable, having difficulty drawing boundaries in relationships… On the other hand, this fluid sense of existence could also be the source of Zen in Eastern culture, with a focus on making efforts to perceive and connect with the surroundings and experiences.

The dual nature of Chinese culture can either weaken or sharpen the characteristics of its people, depending on how it is interpreted and practiced. Significant strength derives from finding peace through accepting uncontrollable changes and sincerely recognizing the meaning and beauty of fragile beings.

Instead of pursuing an eternal image of the self, Chinese culture perceives the earthly world as part of a constant movement cycle, emphasizing the study of interactions and merging between the individual and their surroundings.

4
Artist & Artworks

Tamás Waliczky, The Garden (1992), The Forest (1993), The Way (1995) link

  • A Hungarian artist with an international view

  • The endless wandering: The Forest (1993) creates the infinite space of a forest with no vanishing point”

  • Creating unconventional viewing perspectives: "space-related perceptions," "the construction of a new system of perspective for expressing the world"

  • How to map reality is a cultural rather than optical issue.

Images by me, 2021 winter, landscapes across California

Transnational Psychology of Women: Expanding International and Intersectional Approaches. Lynn H. Collins, Sayaka Machizawa, Joy K. Rice (2019) link

  • An academic publication focusing on the emerging field of Transnational Feminist Psychology

  • “… the new context meant people could have multiple places they called “home,” multiple languages, and even multiple selves.”

  • Situated knowledge & social constructivism: our identities and behaviors are shaped by the social environment

  • “Individuals no longer gain social belonging and social opportunities via birth or lineage. Each individual is responsible himself for finding opportunities of access to and inclusion into the social systems of society.”

  • Frequent Considerations in Transnational Psychologies (selection):

    • address the contexts of globalization and diaspora groups

    • respect and elevate new and silenced voices

    • consider positionality (how one understands the world is influenced by one’s values, views, and social and spatial positions) extremely important

    • examine microlevel through macrolevel contexts and unique local through global influences

    • extend the notion of intersectionality

  • Against the conventional practice of creating a hegemonic female image.

  • For females, the differentiation between forced and voluntary migration is unclear due to the female-oppressive nature of their home societies.

Dream of the Red Chamber. Cao Xueqin (mid-18th century)

  • An impactful work in Chinese history, culture, and literature. It is also mentioned in the book Chinese Literature: A Very Short Introduction.

  • “Symbols of wealth's pleasures, sensual indulgence, and longings for immortality, Chinese gardens traditionally represent sequestered miniatures of an ordered universe.”

  • “A refuge from the ‘world of red dust,’ the Chinese garden offers a microcosm of a patterned universe. The rocks in this garden could symbolize mountains, and the pond a sea.”

  • One theme: love & longing (or the loss of love)

  • A symbolic story: Daiyu's flower burial

    • “Now I take the shovel and bury your scented breath,
      A - wandering when my turn shall be.
      Let me be silly and weep atop your grave,
      For next year who will bury me?”
      — Daiyu’s Flower Burial Poem (trans. Lin Yutang)

    • Burying flowers as well as burying herself for she was the reincarnation of a flower fairy

    • The fallen flowers on the ground are a symbol of “neglected beauty.” Thus the act of burying them could be seen as Daiyu’s effort to honor her pride and self-worth as well as her longing for a secure spiritual home.

    • "Plagued by worry that Baoyu will marry someone else, she withers away, and her frailty contributes to the outcome she most fears."
      — Chinese Literature: A Very Short Introduction

    • The tragic story of Daiyu seems to be an unavoidable self-fulfillment of the karmic cycle: she is unable to escape her fate predetermined as early as her previous life (which interestingly is based on her own wish). Despite being physically fragile as a classical Chinese female character, Daiyu defies traditional expectations in her hopeless but beautiful way - a disturbance of the harmony-seeking social norm.

Ana Mendieta, Untitled: Silueta Series (1978) link

  • A traumatizing cross-nation background: "A Cuban exile, Mendieta came to the United States in 1961, leaving much of her family behind—a traumatic cultural separation that had a huge impact on her art."

  • keywords: body, natural landscape, spiritual connection, ritual, rebirth, femininity

  • “Her Silueta (Silhouette) series (begun in 1973) used a typology of abstracted feminine forms, through which she hoped to access an ‘omnipresent female force.’”

  • “become one with the earth”

  • “In the performance of identity, and in identity as performance, Mendieta is and is not ‘herself.’”

Images source: internet

Whether consciously or not, many contemporary artists have touched on transnationalism in their works. The development of artistic voice has evolved from refining the dominant culture to developing diverse cultures to creating new perspectives through personal cultural experiences.

On the other hand, while technology has deepened urbanization, there is an opposite tendency to reconnect with the physical world and explore the field of consciousness through both emerging technology and humanitarian research.

Design Process

1
Concept

This project comprises a visual narrative composed of five distinctive yet interconnected parts (which will be discussed in the next section). Utilizing body parts, props, organic materials, and everyday objects, these half-improvised real-life performances aim to depict subtle mental states associated with the transnational experience.

While each of the five scenes stands alone as a complete entity, when observed sequentially, they weave a story illustrating how an individual progressively establishes reciprocal connections with the land and undergoes a rebirth with a new identity through the arduous "labor" of fragmentation, alienation, confusion, and cultural restriction.

Written language and stereotypical cultural symbols are deliberately avoided. Instead, vague symbols are designed to create a "familiar unfamiliar" experience and establish a connection with a broader audience.

2
Symbols: derived from Chinese Culture

"Raging Blossoms, Ailing Leaves" 狂花病葉

  • Origin:
    Drinkers refer to those who glare angrily after getting drunk as “raging blossoms,” and those who close their eyes and sleep in a stupor after getting drunk as “ailing leaves.” — “Days and Months in the Drunken Village”
    飲酒者稱醉後怒目忤視者為「狂花」,醉後昏然閉目而睡者為「病葉」。——《醉鄉日月》

  • The project adopts this idiom as its title to encapsulate the dichotomous yet congruent themes. The two images, "Raging Flowers" and "Ailing Leaves," serve as metaphors for the two distinct mental states nurtured under Western and Eastern cultures, respectively: one outspoken, individualistic, and passionate, while the other cautious, contradictory, and enduring. However, these two opposite personalities are interconnected. Continuing with the idiom metaphor, they represent different reactions to the drunken state. Thus, the clashes between the two themes in the film consistently allude to their connection to a single living individual who struggles to wake up from their control to be an integrated person.

“Fallen Leaves Return to Their Roots” 葉落歸根

  • Origin:
    Leaves fall and return to the roots; arriving silently. — “The Jingde Record of the Transmission of the Lamp”
    葉落歸根,來時無口。——《景德傳燈錄》

  • Traditional interpretation: a person who has been away from his or her hometown for a long time would eventually return. (source: Wiktionary)

  • New interpretation: When combined with the Karmic Cycle worldview, the root/homeland/earth could be perceived as a juncture rather than the physical destination of a cultural entity. The land does not merely envelop the deceased; rather, with the power of nature, it receives and transforms lives like a pump powering the cycle. Thus, "Fallen Leaves Return to Their Roots" represents only half of the circle, liberating individuals from the cultural constraints of being tethered to a single nation in the name of loyalty.

“Lin Daiyu Burying Flowers” 黛玉葬花

  • As discussed in the Research section, this plot has been coined into a cultural allusion, serving as an example of classical Chinese tragedy. It represents a contradictory performance that combines the submission of a powerless female under feudal society with rebellion against the hopeless fate dictated by hierarchical culture.

  • From "Fallen Leaves Return to Their Roots" to “Lin Daiyu Burying Flowers,” with a great emphasis on family and nation, we can discern the psychology of the fear of abandonment, disconnection, and loss of recognition in the Chinese cultural mindset.

  • On the other hand, Daiyu’s performance of flower burial also sheds light on the healing power that one can attain through metaphorically and physically collecting, recognizing, and burying one’s broken identities.

Five Directions & Elements 五方與五行

  • Like many cultures across the globe, Chinese culture possesses a Cardinal Direction system that associates elements, colors, seasons, and organs with the five directions.

  • With the theme of navigating, losing, and rediscovering oneself, this cultural element is employed as the structural guide for the narration. The five sections, each corresponding to a direction, incorporate visual and sound designs linked with the five elements.

Samsara/Karmic Cycle 輪迴

  • The karmic cycle is a cultural and spiritual belief deeply rooted in Eastern cultures. Unlike the linear perspective on life, Chinese culture embraces the notion of an eternal movement between life and death, giving rise to beliefs in causation and the omnipresent connections between humans and nature.

3
Symbols: derived from Nature

Red Paper Leaf

  • Crafted from the traditional red Xuan paper commonly used for Lunar New Year couplets and paper cutting, the red paper leaf embodies the theme of "Ailing Leaves" with its classic olive shape and a hole in the middle.

  • The unique design draws its inspiration from traditional joss paper with holes, firecracker strings (for leaf strings), the scales of dragons and koi fish (for paper masks), and the human eye. Therefore this symbol straddles the vague line between life and death, celebration and funeral, human and natural world.

  • The appearance of the Red Paper Leaf across different scenes serves as a poignant reminder of the enduring cultural imprint that simultaneously binds individuals with its outdated values while acting as a key that unlocks the door to a beautiful world infused with spiritual powers shaped by generations.

Eucalyptus Tree Leaf

  • It might come as a surprise to discover that one of California's iconic trees, the blue gum (Eucalyptus globulus), is an alien species originating from Australia that "arrived here as envelopes of seeds on boats coming to California in the 1850s.” (source)

  • Employed as a prop to depict the transformative process of the Red Paper Leaf through the earth, the Eucalyptus Tree Leaf symbolizes the emergence of new life forms and identities reborn from the land.

Body Parts

  • The shots featuring various body parts served multiple purposes: to provide a more intimate perspective, showcasing the human and individual features of the narration; to reinforce the fragmented nature of the living experience by isolating individual body parts; and simultaneously, to act as a connection between these fragmented experiences. Additionally, the absence of covering in most of the shots aimed to portray the vulnerability of the individual, laid bare for substantial interaction with the environment.

Earth/Land

  • As discussed in "Fallen Leaves Return to Their Roots," the land is viewed as an active character, functioning as the juncture that absorbs broken lives and aids in their healing and rebirth. However, this does not imply a smooth, painless process. The land can be soft, like sand, and sharp, like rocks, felt by the bare feet that walk on it and the hands that dig into it, experiencing every inch of its texture.

Ink/Mole/Shadow/Black Sand

  • These elements related to ink marks embody the essence of "Raging Blossoms" — bold, invasive, and fluid.

  • With character-like features, they symbolize the reciprocal imprint and development between the individual and the environment. For instance, the casting shadow on the limbs transforms into ink marks, while the presence of feet on the beach allows the waves to draw traces of black sand. As words were traditionally written with ink, the symbols of "Raging Blossoms" are about initiating conversation and actively finding one's voice.

4
Symbols: artificial visual effects

Glitch

  • Multiple clips were filmed under a similar setting and perspective, then edited together through cropping and overlaying to achieve the glitch effect.

  • The intentional decision to leave slight differences in shooting angles and lighting visible was made to evoke a sense of surrealistic realism.

  • Simultaneously, the transient flickering of the glitches aims to portray the psychological state of sudden disconnection from the current self and environment—similar to a broken television switching to a chaotic state of a mosaic screen.

Double Exposure

  • Similar to the glitch effect, the double exposure or overlay of two partially transparent frames aims to depict an unusual mental state. In contrast to the previous visual effect, it serves as an analogy for the gradual merging of two mental experiences — a blend between two contradictory states, making it almost impossible to discern which is the actual reality.

2. Tree Ghost (West/metal)

5. Flower Tomb (North/water)

3. Raging Blossoms, Ailing Leaves (Central/earth)

1. Leaf Fountains (South/fire)

4. Sun Dye (East/wood)

Images source: internet

Mise-en-scène: Storyboarding/Filming/Sound/Message

1
Leaf Fountains 葉泉
(South/fire)

Visual Effect

  • Glitch (video collage)

Shots

  • (close-up) pick up a red paper leaf on the ground

  • (1st person POV) collect red paper leaves in a cloth bag

  • (1st person POV) dig a hole in the ground

  • pour in red leaves, cover the hole with soil

  • (wide shot) the character stands up eucalyptus leaves gush out of the holes nearby

  • (close-up) uncover the dirt, the red leaves are gone

Sound Effect

  • minor crack sounds from the fireplace: replacing the natural environment sound

  • firework: matching the eruptions of the leaf fountains

Filming Location

  • a space next to Expedition Way (near the UCSD campus)

2
Tree Ghost 樹鬼
(West/metal)

Visual Effect

  • double exposure (overlapping)

Shots

A-roll

  • moving back and forth through a thick bush

B-roll

  • The unreachable but forever present tree

    • when moving forward in the A-roll, the tree retreats

    • moving backward, the tree moves forward

Sound Effect

  • singing bowl: the crisp metal and eerie sound starts and dies down following the beginning and end of each long shot of the back-and-forth movement.

Filming Location

  • (A-roll) Lake Calavera Trail

  • (B-roll) Rose Canyon Loop

3
Raging Blossoms, Ailing Leaves 狂花病葉
(Central/earth)

Visual Effect

  • two juxtaposing screens (left upsidedown; right regular direction)

Shots (linked pairs: red leaf — black flower)

  • (synchronized motion) red lipstick (upside down "smiling") — dark iris, blink from time to time

  • cutting red paper leaf — drawing black ink flower

  • red oil bubbles of a bowl of tomato egg soup stirred by chopsticks — the dark cavity of a rolling dryer

  • (stop-motion) the open and close of a date — the explosion of a blueberry

  • (gradually unsynchronized in stretching and breathing) red stretching palm lines — a black mole on the chest, breathing

  • rosy sunset at the seaside — the back view of the character with black short hair

Sound Effect

  • the dropping sound of rice grains, paced by the movements captured in the film

Filming Location

  • apartment

4
Sun Dye 日染
(East/wood)

Visual Effect

  • A-roll with the occasional cuts of B-roll

  • a gradual increase in the duration of overlapping time of A-roll and B-roll

Shots

A-roll

  • (mid-shot, leg height, hand-held) character walking barefoot along the trail, the shadow of the plants gradually imprints on her calves and thighs in the form of abstract ink patterns

B-roll

  • (mid-shot, leg height, static) legs wrapped with the Red Paper Leaf strings, freeze in the middle/anxiously move around in a small range/run in the opposite direction

Sound Effect

  • (A-roll) wind blowing through a forest

  • (B-roll) strong gusts of wind

Filming Location

  • Rose Canyon trail

5
Flower Tomb 花塚
(North/water)

Visual Effect

  • 90-degree video rotation (creating the illusion of the character vertically facing the ground)

Shots

  • (close-up, vertical) With the mask on, the character gazes into the earth, then slowly buries the face in the ground (a shallow hole is dug beforehand, creating the illusion of emerging head into the ground)

  • (close-up, vertical) On the beach, the character lifts the head from the wave

  • (medium shot, top-down, 1st person POV) with ink-marked and string-wrapped feet being seen, looking down at the waves crashing on the beach, dragging a trace of black sand from the feet

  • (same as above) with ink-marked and string-wrapped feet being seen, looking down at the abstract leaf-shaped silhouette made of a mixture of red leaf, inked black flowers, real leaves on the ground

Sound Effect

  • Land shots: Water dripping in three tempos slowly adds up and then removed

  • Sea shots: bubbling sounds for the head emerging in water; pouring tea sound then soup boiling sound for the retreating wave and flowing black sand.

Filming Location

  • Expedition Way (near UCSD)

  • La Jolla Beach

Message

The first scene pays homage to and offers a new interpretation of "Lin Daiyu Burying Flowers" and “Fallen Leaves Return to Their Roots.” Centered around the symbol of the Red Paper Leaf, the narration emphasizes the “Ailing Leaves“ theme. The surrealistic editing of the eucalyptus leaf fountains initiates the transformation process through the land. Meanwhile, the absence of Red Paper Leaves from the leaf tomb at the end leaves viewers in suspense.

Message

As the legs with black ink take up a larger portion of the screen time, the theme transitions from “Ailing Leaves“ to “Raging Blossoms," with a new focus on continuing the journey of new experiences and constructing new identities. However, intermittently, images of legs wrapped in Red Paper Leaf strings (similar to the tree branches in the Tree Ghost scene) appear, persisting for longer durations each time and beginning to merge with reality. The character starts to exhibit more panicky behavior and eventually runs, attempting to separate from the suppressed, unresolved emotions in their unconsciousness.

Message

The counter-intuitive movement of the character and the “ancestor tree“ (the tree with Red Paper Leaf strings wrapping around its branches) depicts the everlasting presence of the unreachable yet inescapable original cultural connection. Moving back and forth through the thorny bush tunnel, with neither a clear entrance nor exit, aims to evoke the anxious feeling of struggling in an eerie birth canal, laden with indelible distant memories and yet-to-be-developed new identities.

Message

Echoing the assigned direction of Central, this scene presents a parallel state of “Raging Blossoms“ and “Ailing Leaves.“ Unlike other scenes, the complete void of any overlapping or glitch creates a state of division, showcasing the two disconnected life experiences. However, subtle details such as the largely synchronized movements and the categorization of the scenes hint at the presence of one living individual. The additional editing choice of rotating the two frames 180 degrees from each other further enhances this fractured experience, as viewers inevitably perceive part of the reality distorted from any single point of view.

Message

This final scene of the film disrupts the previous theme trend of gradually leaning toward “Raging Blossoms.“ Instead, the two symbols start to coexist in one reality space. Additionally, new elements of ink-stained Red Paper Leaves are introduced with the comeback of the eucalyptus tree leaves. Following the idea of the karmic cycle, the scene returns to the first filming location, with the character now burying herself in the empty hole on the land -- just like what she did with the Red Paper Leaves. The transition to the seaside shots has the only moment of an unmasked face — the only sober moment after all the drunken time struggling between “raging blossoms“ and “ailing leaves“ states, as the title suggests. The last shot of the Red/Inked/Eucalyptus leaves is the silhouette of a tomb for the fragmented self and the reflection of the reborn identity through the connection with the land.

Experience Exhibition Design

1
Projections on the walls and floor inside a cubic space

The project will be displayed in a public space encircled with four walls. Following the design of Five Directions, each of the five scenes will be projected on the corresponding wall (i.e., North, South, East, West, with North facing the entrance), and the Central scene will be projected on the floor.

Headphones will be provided, allowing sounds to be played at increased or decreased volume as the viewers approach or move away from the scenes, encouraging them to explore and figure out the sound and element connection with the scenes.

Together, the enclosed space, the overlapped sounds, and endless projected scenes with ambiguous but interconnected symbols create an immersive multisensory experience. Visitors may feel lost in a disconnected space, but they may also feel deeply involved in spiritual exploration, trying hard to orient themselves around the mental space through reading and understanding the symbols and connections in this environment.

2
An interactive symbol crafting and burial location

A pile of sand and soil will be placed at the center of the floor, accompanied by red paper leaves, colorful papers, and pairs of crafting scissors arranged around it.

Inspired by the performances in the film scenes, visitors are encouraged to actively participate by creating and burying their fragmented identity symbols. This direct engagement invites a discussion on Transnational Psychologies, allowing individuals to experience the death and rebirth of their cultural selves. As the installation progresses, an increasing number of colorful paper cuttings will be buried in the “land,” enabling new explorers to search for and connect with the previous symbols while adding their own. Simultaneously, all the buried symbols become integral to the installation, transforming the narrative of unique individuals into a collective cultural phenomenon.

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Cities and Memories: Ieri